Welcome To My World

“Welcome to my world, won’t you come on in, miracles, I guess, happen now and then…My neice died at 31 years old.  Her Mom is now fighting breast cancer.  My other sister is on hospice–and I pray for healing.

Part of the script to my childhood surfaces in my life fifty plus years later.  Dean Martin, Doris Day, Elvis…some Sunday School songs, too.  “Huffy, white, puffy white clouds in the sky. ” One door and only one and yet its sides are two, I am on the inside, on which side are you?”   Everyone I trusted wasn’t trust worthy.  The dreamy white clouds sometimes give rain.  I am more guarded on who I let “inside”.  

“Ain’t seen a babe like this before, he’s so good lookin’ gonna have some mooooore.  Feet up, pat him on the po-po, I love my son.”… My three sons have brought more joy, more adventures, taken me more places and stretched my thinking and my heart more than I ever could have imagined.  My first born turns 42 this year, and my middle son joins the ranks of the middle aged- my baby 30.  I am a grandma now, and as they say, this is the reward for not killing our kids.  It was all worth it.

“I come to the garden alone, while the dew is still on the roses….” Another key to living is finding that quiet place to be alone with my Saviour, to pray in the quietness for sons and wives and grandchildren and hurting friends and friends that need healing…and for me. “It’s me, it’s me oh Lord, standing in the need of prayer, not my brother, not my sister but it’s me o Lord, standing in the need of prayer.”

“You’re the end of the rainbow, my pot of gold, you’re Daddy’s little girl to have and to hold….”  “My wild Irish rose, the sweetest flower that grows…” Mom went to heaven 11 years ago now.  I was so angry with her for leaving me. We played Sound of Music at her funeral:  .That was Mom and we miss her.   “How do you solve a problem like Maria?”

Daddy deals with daily pain but he is our treasure and we hope to have him with us a few more years.

Back to Dean Martin:  “Secondhand shoes, secondhand clothes, they all call her second hand rose, they all think they are pretty smart, but Rose don’t have a second hand heart”.

Above all things, guard your heart.  Daddy made sure I didn’t grow up with second hands clothes.  I am grateful.

“I wanna hold your ha a and I wanna hold your hand”…I want to hold my Daddy’s hand and keep him close.  I want to hold the hands of my sons and my grandchildren, but in all reality, I am the one that needs my hand held.  I want to draw my family closer–

“Jimmy, oh Jimmy Mack, you better hurry back”

My husband of 44 years goes off to work each day and I still look forward to his homecoming each evening.  We are the blessed ones.  No divorce.  Must be I didn’t take in any of the many break up songs.

I add to the script the voices of the Supremes,  Barbara Streisand, Bob Dylan, James Taylor, Bobby Vinton,  Paul Anka, Simon and Garfunkel… “Listen to the sounds of silence….like a bridge over troubled water…” “Memories, like the corners of my mind, what’s too painful to remember, we simply chose to forget, so its the laughter, that we remember, of the way we were.

Rain drops keep fallin on my head, but that does’mt mean my eyes are turnin’ red, I ‘ll never stop the rain by complaining…because I am free, nothin’s worryin’ me”  Life is good.  Music is a gift.  It is a coping tool, it is the soundtrack for our lives…. “Oh be careful little eyes what you see, for the Father up above is lookin’ down in love…”


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